If your girlfriend has grown cold and distant towards you, you need to read this article to understand what's going on before it's too late. This article will show you how to deal with a distant and cold girlfriend and get her interest back.
The following is based on actual events (names have been changed): Peter had been dating Jane for about six months when he suddenly noticed that Jane was becoming more and more distant. Jane used to like him very much. She was always loving and wanted to be intimate with him. She always answered his calls and always answered his messages. However, over the past two weeks, Peter has noticed that Jane has been less loving. She didn't answer the phone often and he often had to wait hours or days for his girlfriend to reply to his messages. In short, Peter's girlfriend began to break up. Peter wasn't a stupid guy and he had no idea, he knew something was wrong and Jane was pulling away from him. But I didn't know why.
Signs your girlfriend is distant and cold
A man who is dating his girlfriend undoubtedly knows when his girlfriend starts acting distant. It's not difficult to read the characters. But just in case, below I will list the main ways women act aloof in a relationship:
- Suddenly it's hard to talk to her.
- He is slow to respond to messages.
- She doesn't reply to your messages at all.
- She doesn't answer your calls.
- She doesn't seem interested in everything you say.
- He doesn't laugh at your jokes anymore.
- He doesn't look happy when he's around you.
- She is often distracted and pays no attention to you.
- She doesn't want to spend that much time with you.
- She doesn't touch you and doesn't want intimacy with you.
- Nothing you do or say makes her happy.
- The relationship feels like you're doing all the work.
Reasons why your girlfriend is distant
Before you panic about why your girlfriend is acting the way she is, you must first understand why your girlfriend might be acting indifferent.
It's also important to understand that if your girlfriend is distant as a single; For example, she doesn't reply to your text messages or calls only once in a blue moon, so you don't have to worry. You only have to worry if you feel like your girlfriend has become more and more distant over time.
She loses attraction to you
This is one of the main reasons why a girl starts acting distant. She is losing or has lost her attraction to you. This sudden withdrawal hits most men like a dagger in the heart, even if your girlfriend's withdrawal is subtle. And unless you're completely blind, you'll notice the fact that she doesn't seem that interested in you anymore.
When your girlfriend begins to lose her attraction to you, you will feel like nothing you say or do could interest her more. Unfortunately, you feel this way because it's true that everything you say or do is no longer interesting to your girlfriend.
She's losing her attraction to you and it won't be long before your girlfriend starts acting completely cold and withdrawn... and from there it's almost a guarantee that if you don't take the right steps, she'll dump you do to increase his attraction to you again. 🇧🇷
She doesn't want to get hurt.
Women often fear being hurt in a relationship. They've been heartbroken before and they don't want to go through it again.
If your girlfriend feels like her behavior might hurt her, or if her behavior reminds her of an ex-boyfriend who previously hurt her, she is likely to withdraw her feelings and emotions from the relationship.
If your girlfriend doesn't want you to hurt her and starts acting distant, she's also saying that she doesn't trust you fully and is protecting her feelings and heart.
she is really busy
It is very likely that your girlfriend is simply acting aloof because she is legally employed. Life can be difficult and stressful sometimes, especially when your girlfriend is an active person, she might want to achieve things and do many things, but she might feel like she doesn't have time for all of that.
If your girlfriend has a job, wants to exercise, stay in shape, socialize, and see her friends, then she really doesn't have much time left to focus on in a relationship. It can be very difficult to find a balance in the relationship in this situation.
Your girlfriend may have been very close and loving to you at first, but she may feel that she has been spending too much time in the relationship and now needs to make up for it and focus on other areas of her life.
It's important that you don't get too upset when you find yourself in this situation, just understand that your girlfriend is trying to find a balance in her life, that doesn't mean she wants to leave you even if you do that's how you feel She leaves.
She is angry with you and punishes you
If your girlfriend is mad at you and wants to punish you, she may seem distant and withdrawn. It's just her way of saying she's not happy with you.
A girl I met told me that she was on a date and at that moment her boyfriend spat the food on the floor. The girl was upset about this and didn't really say anything about it, just remaining calm and distant. Her boyfriend, totally unaware, thought her silence meant she had bipolar disorder and didn't understand how her rude behavior had driven his girlfriend into a state of estrangement and withdrawal.
When a girl is angry it is very common for her to be distant and cold. This doesn't necessarily mean she wants to end the relationship, it just means she's mad at you and wants to make you suffer. However, how you handle this situation will depend on whether your girlfriend returns to you or whether she becomes more withdrawn over time.
she tests you
When your girlfriend is testing you, she may seem cold and distant. Your girlfriend may test you for a variety of reasons. Your tests can be real or made up, it doesn't matter. The most important thing is how you respond to your girlfriend's tests.
If you react wrongly and don't face your girlfriend's difficulties properly, she will grow further and further away from you until she finally loses all attraction to you and breaks up with you.
If you take a test and your girlfriend suddenly gets cold towards you, it means you are failing the tests and not doing things right.
She is interested in someone else
It happens all the time: a guy's girlfriend starts seeing another guy behind his back, and at the same time his girlfriend grows further and further away from him.
No man wants to accept the reality that his girlfriend might be dating another man behind his back. One of the first signs is that his girlfriend is showing less and less interest in him.
You no longer respond to your partner's texts, you no longer want to be intimate with them, and you no longer find them interesting.
If your girlfriend pulls away because she's interested in someone else, then so be itvery important that you do something about it as soon as possible– If you don't act in this situation, your girlfriend will most likely leave you soon. The writing is on the wall, you have been warned!
She's thinking about breaking up with you.
The first sign that your girlfriend is considering breaking up with you is when she begins to feel more and more withdrawn and distant.
There will always be a time when your girlfriend starts thinking about breaking up with you and she actually breaks up with you.
During this time, your girlfriend will start pushing you away and disrespecting you more and more. The most disrespectful and hurtful part of this situation is that your girlfriend doesn't tell you how she really feels, she just chooses to withdraw her feelings completely.
When a woman holds back her feelings, she ends up becoming more and more distant. Women can't hide their true emotions, and if they're not into you emotionally (or if their emotions die), they'll physically withdraw and become distant.
She has an elusive personality.
If your girlfriend has an avoidant personality, it means she will have trouble forming close bonds and showing intimacy.
Having a girlfriend with an avoidant personality type means that your girlfriend doesn't want any closeness or intimacy with you or anyone else. You don't have to take this personally, but you have to realize that you can't approach this type of girl without her dramatically pulling away from you at some point.
a girl with Aattachment-avoidant personality styleIt will always be like this and you cannot change it. But this type of attachment style is rare and not something you usually have to worry about.
If your girlfriend breaks up, don't do it.
Jane had been withdrawn from Peter for a week, and Peter knew she was withdrawing more and more. Peter was upset and frightened by Jane's behavior. He tried to call her more and write to her more, but the more he did it, the more withdrawn she became.
It made no sense. Jane used to be so in love with him. She called him all the time and loved being around him. Now nothing interested him anymore what he said.
Peter was desperate. He tried to ask Jane what was wrong and she kept saying "It's fine". Peter tried to touch Jane and she kept pulling away. He tried to sleep with her but she said she was tired. But Jane wasn't tired, she just didn't want to be around Peter anymore... she wasn't sorry. She also met another man who she found extremely attractive and interesting (as Peter used to be). A month later, Jane left Peter for this other man.
Peter didn't know what he had done wrong. He was very kind and considerate to Jane, but she left him anyway. Peter was heartbroken. What he didn't understand was that if he had done things right, Jane would have returned to him with an even greater attraction than ever.
The solution
When his girlfriend withdraws and starts withdrawing, a man's natural reaction is to pursue her and try to force her back.
However, what most men don't realize is that a woman is like a cat. Sometimes she wants to be near you and be petted by you, and other times she wants to go out and do her thing. And when a cat wants to get out, unless you want to scratch its face, it's impossible to stop it.
An important principle to understand is that whatever you are doing with your girlfriend right now will push her away and make her seem distant. As a result, you have to start doing the exact opposite of what you are doing and what your gut is telling you.
Your friend withdraws from you and you in turn must imitate her actions and withdraw from her as well; Your girlfriend wants to be close to you, so let her get closer and show her affection in return.
Two years after breaking up with Peter, Jane began dating Paul. Paul had been dating Jane for about six months when he suddenly noticed that Jane was becoming more and more distant. Jane used to like him very much. She was always loving and wanted to be intimate. She always answered his calls and always answered his messages. In recent weeks, however, Paul has noticed that Jane is less loving, doesn't answer her phone as often, and often has to wait hours or days for her friend to reply to her text messages. In short, Paul's girlfriend started breaking up. Paul wasn't a silly guy and he wasn't ignorant, he knew something was wrong and Jane was pulling away from him. But unlike Peter, Paul understood women...
Paul immediately broke off contact with Jane and also began to distance himself from her. Of course, Jane didn't write or talk to Paul for a few days, but he didn't care. In fact, Paul was having fun, hanging out with his friends, working out, and even talking to a few friends who also liked him.
Jane was angry with Paul and decided that she wanted to get away from him to punish him. However, she noted that Paul didn't seem to mind. He was having fun and when he finally contacted him to ask about it, Paul didn't apologize for his behavior and just laughed.
Jane quickly realized that he wouldn't care if she walked away from Paul. I would just go ahead and find another girl. Paul's courage suddenly shot up in Jane's eyes. He looked so confident and confident and when Jane pulled away from him he didn't care. Paul wasn't like all the other boys in her life who would freak out when she got cold and distant...he was a strong, confident man.
Well, as a psychologist, I always like to back up what I say with solid scientific evidence based on valid empirical research. And it's scientifically proven that women really aremore attracted to men who appear to be more selfish and brave (University of Amsterdam).
This means that if your girlfriend starts acting distant, you shouldn't fall into an overprotective and loving mode and try to solve all her problems. You can't fix his emotional state anyway, only time can. The best thing you can do is walk away and have your girlfriend come back when she's ready.
That is also shownplay hard seems to workas quoted inEuropean personality magazine.
"Less available people are viewed as more desirable romantic prospects."
This is an interesting study. This shows that "scarcity" and "unavailability" actually make a man more desirable and attractive to his girlfriend when he withdraws from her.
It's also important that your girlfriend can feel all of your feelings, including sadness. Understand that when you are sad or angry, you also want to stay away for a while. However, if you also mirror her feelings and withdraw from your girlfriend, you put her in a state of fear and insecurityIt has been scientifically proven that when your girlfriend is in this state, it increases a woman's attraction to a man(University of Virginia).
If you urgently need an answer to solve your situation, do not hesitate to make an appointment.consult by email or telephonewith me and I will reply as soon as possible.
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PD.If you want to build INTENSE attraction to women, I highly recommend getting a copy of my book.atomic attraction(Kindle/Paperback/Audio). In these pages you will find everything you need to know about creating, building and maintaining attractions.
PPS.When a girl pulls away from you or leaves you, whatRestore (Action Plan)will give you an instant solution to your problem. This guide will show you the quickest and easiest way to get it back and maintain it.